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Vírgenes y Santos

San Juan de Dios. Marzo 8

San Patricio. Marzo 17

San José. Marzo 19

Solemnidad de la Anunciación

del Señor. Marzo 25

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Celebrating Catholic Schools Week around our schools

JACKSON – Bishop Kopacz speaks to Sister Thea Bowman School students at a special Catholic Schools Week Mass. (Photo by Christopher Payne)
GREENVILLE – Greg Fore receives communion from Bishop Kopacz at Mass at St. Joseph School. (Photo by Nikki Thompson)
NATCHEZ – Father Aaron Williams blesses the throat of sixth grader John Zachary Wingfield on St. Blaise’s feast day on Friday, Feb. 3.
VICKSBURG – Pictured after Mass at Vicksburg Catholic School are Jon Graham, Katie Emfinger, Fathers P.J. Curley, Rusty Vincent, Joseph Nguyen, Robert Dore, Bishop Joseph R. Kopacz, Vicar General Father Lincoln Dall, Karla Luke and Mary Arledge. (Photo by Lindsey Bradley)
MADISON – St. Anthony welcomed Bishop Kopacz to Mass during Catholic Schools Week celebration of vocations day. Pictured left to right are James Dukes, Bishop Kopacz and Ben Schenk. (Photo by Kati Loyacono)
HOLLY SPRINGS – Father Jack Kurps, SCJ, led Monday’s prayer service at Holy Family. Students and staff members received a special blessing and were presented with a certificate of appreciation. (Photo courtesy of school)
CLARKSDALE – Students, Waverly Roach and Ella Bronwyn Graves bring forth the gifts during Mass at St. Elizabeth during Cathoilic School Week. (Photo by Sarah Cauthen)
VICKSBURG – St. Mary parish celebrated Catholic School Week with their Vicksburg Catholic School students; Miracle Flowers (commentator), De’Marques Flowers (altar server), Me’Kayla Flowers (altar server) and Eva Evans (altar server). (Photo by Leonette Thomas)
GREENVILLE – St. Joseph fifth graders, Caryn Jackson, Matthew Lipscomb and Elizabeth Baldwin, enjoy a reading break between activities during Catholic Schools Week. (Photo by Nikki Thompson)
TUPELO – Santiago Lopez and Nathan Eschete wash vans used daily by the Boys and Girls Club of Tupelo. (Photo by Mary Frances Strange
MADISON – St. Joseph student, Ted Klopman prepares himself a complementary cup of hot chocolate on Student Appreciation Day during Catholic Schools Week. (Photo by AK Stephen)

JACKSON – Sister Thea Bowman School sixth grader, Bailey Thiac presents her science fair project to the judges. (On right) Sixth grader, Ashleigh Mason explains her science fair project to the panel of judges. (Photos by Christopher Payne)

Catholic Service Appeal kicks-off

By Joanna Puddister King
JACKSON – As the Diocese of Jackson kicks off the 2023 Catholic Service Appeal (CSA), director of Stewardship and Development, Rebecca Harris shared her thanks for the Synod process over the last year.

“As a diocese, we listened and heard the voices of the people calling for more programs for youth and young adults, more faith formation for adults and opportunities for healing,” said Harris.

“I’m pleased that the CSA can be a part of aiding ministries grow and flourish in our church in these ways.”

In the fall of 2022, the diocese began an office for young adult and campus ministry as a response to the call for more opportunities for young adults. This year, the CSA is able to assist this office with funds raised through the appeal to help young adults continue to grow in their faith beyond college.

Each year in January Bishop Joseph Kopacz sends letters to all parishioners in the diocese asking for support of ministries that are vital to the Catholic faith.

“When you make a gift you become the ‘Hope Rising’ to those served by the appeal,” Harris says.

The Catholic community can become the hope to those served by these ministries: Seminarian Education, Catholic Schools, Retired Priests, Clergy Assistance, Permanent Diaconate Ministry, Catholic Charities, Campus Ministry, Formation Ministry and Religious Education, Intercultural Ministry, Evangelization and Communication, Family Ministry, Young Adult Ministry, Youth Ministry and grants for Parishes and Schools.

For detailed information on each of these ministries supporters can visit website csa.jacksondiocese.org.

Harris says that supporters will also find stories from people who have been supported by the Catholic Service Appeal.

“This year, we are featuring stories that show a small piece of how donations to the CSA make huge impacts.”

Supporters can click on the “Voices” page to see how donations supported Izzy from the Catholic Charities Unaccompanied Refugee Minor program; or learn how Catholic Charities Born Free program supported Jada to deliver a healthy baby boy free of drugs. Site visitors can also read how the vocations ministry supported Deacon Carlisle Beggerly as he answered the call of God; and discover how Eduardo Padilla reached deep into his faith and became a leader at his parish. And lastly, read how youth ministry supports youth like Emerson Erwin of St. Joseph Gluckstadt to attend retreats like SEARCH.

“Your prayers and generosity always make a difference,” says Bishop Joseph Kopacz.

There are several ways to give to the 2023 Catholic Service Appeal. Pledge cards can be mailed to PO Box 22723; Jackson, MS 39225; and supporters can visit csa.jacksondiocese.org to donate online.

Gifts of stocks can also be made to support the Catholic Service Appeal. For more information on the CSA, contact Rebecca Harris at (601) 960-8477.

(Editor’s note: See the special Catholic Service Appeal insert in this edition of Mississippi Catholic to learn more about all the ministries supported by this appeal.)

Canons, policies guide archives research

From the Archives
By Mary Woodward

JACKSON – Over the past several years programs such as Finding Your Roots have increased an awareness of the existence of records in Catholic archives that could help further family tree research by genealogists and others interested in discovering ancestors.

Ancestry.com DNA tests can reveal ethnic origins and miniscule percentages of faraway lands where one’s 15th great-grandfather would have roamed in the 1500s. I have two friends who did a 23andMe test and found out they were Neanderthals.

Our diocesan archives exist to maintain official diocesan records and documentation of official acts of the bishop. The Code of Canon Law states:

Can. 486 §1. All documents which regard the diocese or parishes must be protected with the greatest care.

Diocesan Chancellor and archivist, Mary Woodward searches for a parish sacramental record on microfilm in one of several archive storage rooms at the diocese chancery office in Jackson. (Photos courtesy of archives)

§2. In every curia there is to be erected in a safe place a diocesan archive, or record storage area, in which instruments and written documents which pertain to the spiritual and temporal affairs of the diocese are to be safeguarded after being properly filed and diligently secured.

§3. An inventory, or catalog, of the documents which are contained in the archive is to be kept with a brief synopsis of each written document.


In our archives’ office we often get genealogy requests for baptismal records of parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents. Our archive collections contain microfilmed and digitized copies of parish sacramental registers. These copies exist to safeguard the official book registers kept in parishes.

In the past, hurricanes, fires and theft have damaged parish registers. Our copies are available when needed for those particular parishes that have lost registers. Every 10 years we make copies of all parish sacramental registers. The next scheduled round of copying is set for 2026.

Our diocesan policy is these baptismal records are accessible to our approved researcher only. Individuals must submit in writing the records they seek. The archive vault is not open for individuals to come in and look around.

Records must be 100 years or older to be released. Therefore, the only records we can allow to be searched for genealogical purposes as of today are those from 1923 and back.

What I have to explain to inquirers is that the diocesan archives do not exist to fulfill genealogy searches. We will try our best to help but it may take a few months and there is a fee to open the vault for these types of requests.

The latest craze in genealogical research is individuals seeking to establish Dual Italian Citizenship. Apparently, if you meet several criteria you can obtain an Italian passport. According to the Italian Dual Citizenship website Italian/American dual citizenship requirements include five basic guidelines:

  1. You are descended from someone who was alive in Italy after March 17, 1861.
  2. The ancestor did not naturalize in another country before June 14, 1912.
  3. The ancestor did not naturalize before the birth of descendants interested in getting Italian citizenship.
  4. If the direct-line Italian ancestor is a woman born before January 1, 1948, citizenship can only be claimed from her father’s line.
  5. No one in the family renounced their Italian citizenship.
    You may also qualify if you are a non-Italian who married an Italian citizen.

Because of the large Italian immigrant population along the river in our diocese, we have gotten several requests for sacramental records to help individuals qualify for this genealogical oddity. These requests require more paperwork than other requests. The local parish has to provide a baptismal or marriage record signed and sealed by the current pastor and witnessed by a public notary. It is then sent to the chancery for the diocesan seal to be attached.

Once again, these records must be older than 100 years for us to process them. Parishes are bound by the same policy of 100 years or older.

For more recent records as in the case of someone needing a baptismal certificate for marriage preparation files, the individual of record must request the certificate and present proof of identification if he or she is not known in the parish with the register.

Many times we have received a call from someone’s mother requesting the record so her child can get married and we have to tell the well-intentioned mom that her son or daughter will have to contact us directly. That does not go over too well sometimes, but in this day of identity theft, we cannot release private information to anyone other than the named person or his or her legal guardian in the case of a minor.

Therefore, if you are thinking about researching your family tree and want to use sacramental records, please note the policies above and be patient with us. We are a very small staff and although we enjoy talking with you, our main responsibilities do not include genealogy.

(Mary Woodward is Chancellor and Archivist for the Diocese of Jackson.)

Northwest parishes thirst for ‘Cocktails and Catholicism’

By Laura Grisham
SOUTHAVEN – Leadership at the Catholic parishes of Northwest Mississippi were in for a surprise when they held their first evening of “Cocktails and Catholicism” at Sacred Heart School in Southaven in January. What was thought that would be a group of maybe 20 to 30 people intimately gathered in the school library, exploded into nearly 250 in attendance gathered in the school gym.

Parents, grandparents, teachers, staff, alumni, as well as parishioners from each of the six Northwest parishes that include Christ the King, Southaven; Good Shepherd, Robinsonville; Holy Spirit, Hernando; Queen of Peace, Olive Branch; St. Gregory, Senatobia; and St. Joseph, Holly Springs, were there.

“We have been blown away by the number of people who have been interested and participated,” said David Delgado, parishioner and Sacred Heart School parent and alumnus.

Delgado and Father David Szatkowski, SCJ, moderator of the six Northwest parishes, were the brains behind the event. Others joined them in helping to make it a success, including fellow parishioner and Sacred Heart School parent, Brad Palmertree and Deacon Ted Schreck.

SOUTHAVEN – Parish members from the Catholic parishes of Northwest Mississippi came out to socialize and listen to a presentation by Father David Szatkowski, SCJ on “The Real Story of Angels and Demons” at Sacred Heart School. The new initiative is called “Cocktails and Catholicism.” The first event brought out almost 250 individuals to participate. The events will take place the second Friday every month. (Photo by Laura Grisham)

The idea for the sessions began in the summer of 2021. The vision was for a small group of adult Catholics to come together and be drawn back into church life through a series of topics. But the pandemic still had tight reigns on large gatherings, so the idea was tabled for a bit. It was reintroduced as school began in fall of 2022.

Taking cues from input gathered in the synod process, adding more adult faith formation opportunities was a key component. “But we also heard a large number of people talk about their desire to know others better,” said Father David.

From there, the plan came together, creating a casual, fun environment for people to gather in fellowship, in conjunction with a 30-minute-long presentation on a theological topic. The hospitality aspect was added to make people feel at home once they arrived at the sessions. Snacks and faith-related discussion would be provided; the cocktails (and colas) would be BYOB.

So far, nearly 200 have already signed up for the next session, with more and more responding every day. In order to handle the volume of attendees without the event conflicting with school activities or creating parking issues, it was decided to move gatherings to the family life center at Holy Spirit Church in Hernando.

SOUTHAVEN – Father David Szatkowski, SCJ is part of the brains behind the “Cocktails and Catholicism” event in the northwest region of the state. He is pictured at the first event on Friday, Jan. 13 at Sacred Heart School giving a talk entitled “The Real Story of Angels and Demons.” A copy of the presentation can be found on YouTube at @NWMSCatholic. (Photo by Laura Grisham)

“We hope to establish a stronger Catholic community in our area,” says Delgado. “And provide a spiritual ‘ramp’ for those who might need it. Sharing topics of faith in a unique, less intimidating setting seems to attract a really good crowd.”

The topic for the first gathering was “The Real Story of Angels and Demons” presented by Father David on – most appropriately – Friday the 13th. (One can find Father David’s full presentation on the Catholic Parishes of Northwest Mississippi’s YouTube channel @NWMSCatholic.)

“Cocktails and Catholicism” sessions will be held monthly on the second Friday of each month, with doors opening at 6 p.m. for socializing and presentations beginning at 7:15 p.m., followed by a short question and answer session.

Organizers have scheduled speakers from across northwest Mississippi and greater Mid-South through mid-year. Future topics include the following:

• “Can We Eat Alligator on Friday and Other Important Things to Know as You Prepare for Lent” on Feb. 10 with Father Ben Bradshaw of St. Michael’s parish in Memphis and creator of “Soul Food Priest.”
• March 10: “What gives you Hope? Jean Valjean’s Life Changed in a Moment” with Deacon Ted Schreck.
• April 14: “The Resurrection: Fulfillment of God’s Promises – If Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is in vain” with Sister Mary Lawrence, OP.
• May 12:“Sister Says…” with Sister Margaret Sue Broker, OSF.
• June 9: “Talking the Talk and Walking the Walk: Evangelizing as a Catholic” with Father Dennis Schenkel.
• July 14: “Confession” with Father Gabe Bouck.

(All events are adults only and arecurrently held at Holy Spirit parish in Hernando at 545 East Commerce Street. More information contact Deacon Ted Schreck at Christ the King parish at (662) 342-1073.)

Where in the world is Catholic Mass attendance highest?

By John Burger
WASHINGTON (OSV News) – The nation with the best Catholic Mass attendance in the world could be Nigeria according to a new study published by the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA).

When asked the question “Apart from weddings, funerals and christenings, about how often do you attend religious services these days?” 94% of self-identified Nigerian Catholics surveyed said they attend weekly or daily Mass.

A woman prays during morning Mass at St. Charles Church in Kinshasa, Congo, Jan. 22, 2023. The Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA) gathers results of a poll conducted by the World Values Survey and reports findings on Mass attendance worldwide, noting that pre-and-post-pandemic factors and economic correlations affect those numbers. (OSV News photo/Justin Makangara, Reuters)

The poll was conducted by the World Values Survey, which began tracking the data in the 1980s and has statistics for 36 countries with large Catholic populations. CARA, which gathered the results, said it’s not known exactly which country has the highest Mass attendance rate, “because surveys have not been conducted on the topic in every country in the world.”

But among those surveyed by WVS, aside from Nigeria, weekly or more frequent Mass attendance is highest among adult self-identified Catholics in Kenya (73%) and Lebanon (69%).

– Latin America, and Europe –
“The next segment of countries, where half or more Catholics attend every week, includes the Philippines (56%), Colombia (54%), Poland (52%), and Ecuador (50%),” CARA, which is based at Georgetown University, said. “Fewer than half, but a third or more attend every week in Bosnia and Herzegovina (48%), Mexico (47%), Nicaragua (45%), Bolivia (42%), Slovakia (40%), Italy (34%), and Peru (33%).”

It added that between three in 10 and a quarter of Catholics attend Mass every week in Venezuela (30%), Albania (29%), Spain (27%), Croatia (27%), New Zealand (25%), and the United Kingdom (25%).

– Pre-and-post-pandemic –
Catholics in the United States come in next, with about 24% attending Mass every week or more often prior to the COVID-19 pandemic.

“In our most recent poll in late summer 2022, 17% of adult Catholics reported attending Mass this frequently with 5% watching Mass online or television from home instead,” CARA said.

Other countries with similar Catholic Mass attendance to the United States are Hungary (24%), Slovenia (24%), Uruguay (23%), Australia (21%), Argentina (21%), Portugal (20%), the Czech Republic (20%), and Austria (17%), the center said.

The lowest levels of weekly attendance are observed in Lithuania (16%), Germany (14%), Canada (14%), Latvia (11%), Switzerland (11%), Brazil (8%), France (8%) and the Netherlands (7%).

– Not necessarily “religious” – 
In a breakdown of the report for Aleteia.org John Burger notes that, surprisingly, it’s not necessarily the case that Catholics who consider themselves to be very religious are more likely to be frequent Mass attenders.

Lebanon, for example, has high Mass attendance but the share of Catholics there considering themselves to be religious is substantially lower in comparison to other countries. And 97% of Catholics in Uruguay consider themselves to be religious, yet only 23% of Catholics there attend Mass weekly or more often.

Other than Uruguay, the countries where Catholics are most likely to consider themselves to be religious are Nigeria (95%), Albania (94%), Slovakia (93%), the Czech Republic (92%), Italy (92%), Lithuania (92%), Kenya (92%), Colombia (92%), Bolivia (91%) and Poland (90%).

– Correlation with wealth –
CARA also noticed some correlation between economic factors and Mass attendance and concluded that Catholicism is strongest in what is often called the developing world, where GDP per capita is lower.

“It appears to be contracting in wealthier ‘developed’ countries,” the center said. “The precise mechanisms associated with economic development and wealth that are impacting Catholics’ participation in the faith and identification as religious are unclear. Whatever they are, they matter significantly.”

(John Burger writes at Aleteia.org, where this piece first appeared.)

Sermon on the Mount, words anything but ordinary

By Bishop Joseph R. Kopacz, D.D.
In the face of unrelenting violence in our world, in our nation and in our communities, our faith in the crucified and risen Lord offers another vision for living. During this stretch of time that we call Ordinary between the Christmas season and Ash Wednesday, we are blessed this year to hear the teachings of the Lord Jesus from the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew chapters 5-7), words that are anything but ordinary.

Rather, they provide a clear but demanding road to travel to embrace our identities as Christians, a way of life rooted in God storing up treasures in heaven. The following excerpts from the Sermon are a counterweight to the scourge of violence throughout our world with no one appearing to have a corner on the market with inhumanity.

A stained glass window at St. Gummarus Church in Lier, Belgium depicts the Sermon on the Mount. (Photo courtesy of BigStock)

“Blessed are the Peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.”

“Blessed are the merciful, for mercy will be theirs.”

“Blessed are they who mourn, they will be comforted.”

“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.”

“You are the salt of the earth; you are the light of the world … and your light must shine before all so that they may see your good works and give praise to your Father in heaven.”

“You have in your Law that you shall not kill, and anyone who kills will be liable to judgment. But I say to you that anyone who is angry with his brother shall be liable to judgment. Therefore, when offering your gift at the altar, if you should remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift at the altar and first go to be reconciled with your brother. Then return and offer your gift.”

“Love your enemies. You have heard that it was said: ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you: “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. This will make you children of your Heavenly Father. For he causes his sun to rise on the just and the unjust, and his rain falls on both the righteous and the wicked. If you love only those who love you, what reward will you receive? And if you greet only your brethren, what about that is so extraordinary? Therefore, strive to be perfect, even as your Heavenly Father is perfect.”

Some might respond to these Gospel imperatives, get real; this is not the way the world works. God might respond in turn; get real, my world is broken, and your way doesn’t appear to be working.

Blessed are the peacemakers. Pope Francis’ historic mission of peace last week to the Republic of the Congo, to the South Sudan and to other nations in Africa with the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby and Reverend Iain Greenshields, the moderator of the Presbyterian Church in Scotland is bringing the light of Gospel to these war weary and violence plagued countries. These ambassadors for Christ are pleading for peace, admonishing the political leaders over their failure to stabilize their countries, and in many cases, over their corrupt leadership.

On the other hand, Pope Francis spoke words of encouragement to the youth and young adults to break with the violence and to demand from their civic and religious leaders the paths of peace, stability and development. He also challenged the clergy, Catholic, Presbyterian and Anglican, to have a hunger for justice and peace and to not remain on the sidelines out of fear or hopelessness. It’s the Sermon on the Mount nearly two thousand years later.

We pray that the light of the Gospel of justice and peace can bring hope to the South Sudan, to the streets of America, to the cities of the Ukraine and to all who suffer from the oppression of violence in all forms. Like the Pope, the Archbishop and the Moderator, we pray for the desire to hunger and thirst for justice and peace so that our light may reflect the light, mind and heart of Jesus Christ. We are players and not bystanders who need to prevail in this struggle for humanity with far more at stake than who takes home the Super Bowl trophy.

Marriage is a gift from God that benefits everyone, pope says

By Carol Glatz
VATICAN CITY (CNS) – Marriage is not a ceremony, a social event, a mere formality or an abstract ideal, Pope Francis said.

Marriage, according to Christian revelation, is a gift from God that joins a man and woman together so that “the two shall become one flesh,” and “what God has joined together, no human being must separate,” the pope said, quoting the Gospel of Matthew.

Marriage is also “an extraordinary good, a good of extraordinary value for everyone: for the spouses themselves, for their children, for all families with whom they form relationships, for the entire church, for all of humanity,” the pope told members of the Roman Rota, a Vatican-based tribunal that deals mainly with marriage cases and requests for marriage annulments.

“Every true marriage, even a non-sacramental one, is a gift of God to the spouses,” the pope told the tribunal members Jan. 27. “Matrimony is always a gift! Conjugal fidelity rests on divine fidelity; conjugal fruitfulness is based on divine fruitfulness. Man and woman are called to accept this gift and freely correspond to it with the reciprocal gift of self.”

Pope Francis talks to a group of sisters attending an audience with members of the Roman Rota, a Vatican tribunal, at the end of an audience at the Vatican Jan. 27, 2023. The Vatican court deals mainly with appeals in marriage annulment cases. (CNS photo/Vatican Media)

As the members inaugurated the tribunal’s judicial year, Pope Francis said he wanted to focus his talk on marriage “because there is a great need in the church and in the world to rediscover the meaning and value of the conjugal union between a man and a woman on which the family is based.”

St. John Paul II described the celebration of the sacrament of matrimony as offering a “new heart” so that “the couples are not only able to overcome ‘hardness of heart,’ but also and above all they are able to share the full and definitive love of Christ, the new and eternal covenant made flesh,” the pope said, quoting from the 1981 document, “Familiaris Consortio.”

“Marriage according to Christian revelation is not a ceremony or a social event, no,” Pope Francis said. “It is neither a formality nor an abstract ideal: it is a reality with its own precise consistency, not a form of mere emotional satisfaction that can be constructed in any way or modified at will.”

At the same time, the pope said, “marriage should not be idealized, as if it existed only where there are no problems.”

God’s plan “is always fulfilled imperfectly” in human hands, he said, and yet the Lord is present in the family “with all their daily troubles and struggles, joys and hopes.”

Life as a family makes it “difficult to pretend and lie; we cannot hide behind a mask,” he said. “If that authenticity is inspired by love, then the Lord reigns there, with his joy and his peace.”

For married couples in crisis, “the church, both pastors and other faithful, accompanies them with love and hope, seeking to support them,” he said. “A fundamental resource for facing and overcoming crises is to renew awareness of the gift received in the sacrament of marriage, an irrevocable gift, a source of grace on which we can always count.”

Pope Francis said there is a need “to rediscover the permanent reality of marriage as a bond,” especially since the “bond” is often thought of as an “imposition, a burden, a ‘tether’ in opposition to the authenticity and freedom of love.”

“If, on the other hand, the bond is understood precisely as a bond of love, then it reveals itself as the core of marriage, as a divine gift that is the source of true freedom and that safeguards married life,” he said.

The church can assist engaged and married couples to deepen their love and overcome difficulties not just by helping them accept its doctrinal teachings and its valuable spiritual resources, he said. The church can also help by offering “practical programs, sound advice, strategies based on experience and psychological guidance.”

To fall in love

IN EXILE
By Father Ron Rolheiser, OMI

To fall in love! We use the expression to cover many things. You can fall in love with a baby, a sports team, a city, a job or another person. However, we reserve the prime analogate for this expression for one thing, emotional infatuation, that intoxicating feeling we first get when we meet someone who we sense as a soulmate.

Iris Murdoch once wrote that the world can change in fifteen seconds because that’s how quickly you can fall in love with someone. She’s right, and falling in love emotionally can literally paralyze us with a grip so strong that even death seems preferable to losing the one with whom we have fallen in love. Countless heartaches, broken hearts, depressions, clinical breakdowns, suicides, murders and murder-suicides testify to this. Emotional infatuation can be a deadly addiction, the most powerful cocaine on the planet. Where does it come from? Heaven or hell? And, what’s its meaning?

Father Ron Rolheiser, OMI

Ultimately, God and nature are its author and that tells us that it is a good thing. We are built for this to happen to us. Moreover, it is a healthy thing, if properly understood, both in its intoxicating power and in its innate failure to be a sustaining power in love.

What happens when we fall in love so powerfully with someone? Are we really in love with that person or are we more in love with being in love and the feelings this brings us? As well, are we really in love with that person or are we in love with an image of him or her we have created for ourselves, one that projects a certain godliness on to that other?

Let me risk some answers. Imagine a man falling deeply in love with a woman. Initially, the feelings can be overpowering and literally paralyze him emotionally. However, inside of all this, a certain question begs to be asked: with whom or with what is he really in love? His feelings? The archetype of femininity the woman is carrying? His image of her? She herself?

In reality, he is in love with all of these: his feelings, his image of her, she herself and the divine feminine she is carrying. All of that is of one piece inside of his experience. As well, all of this can be healthy at this stage of love.

God invented emotional infatuation, just as God invented honeymoons. We are not meant to be drawn to each other by cold analytics alone. But, this kind of falling in love is an initiatory stage in love (albeit a delightful one) that needs to be understood exactly for what it is, an initiatory stage, nothing more, one that invites us into something deeper. Emotional infatuation is not yet a mature stage in love.

Unless one dies in its grip, as did Romeo and Juliet, it will one day lose its hold on us and leave us disillusioned. When Iris Murdoch said that we can fall in love in fifteen seconds, she might also have added that, sadly, we can also fall out of love in fifteen seconds. Emotional infatuation can be that ephemeral, both in its birth and in its dying.

So falling in love (in this emotional way) comes fraught with certain dangers. First, there is the adolescent proclivity to identify this with deep love itself. Consequently, when the powerful emotional and psychosexual feelings let go, the person easily concludes that he or she is no longer in love and moves on. Next, more subtly, there is this danger. When we are in this initial gripping stage of love, our image of the other carries with it a certain godliness. What’s meant by that?

St. Augustine coined this timeless dictum: You have made us for yourself, Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you. Hence, nothing in life can ever really be enough for us. We are always restless, always yearning for something more. However, in this initial phase of love, when we have fallen into the grip of emotional infatuation, for a time the other is enough for us. That’s why Romeo and Juliet could die happy. At this stage of love, they were enough for each other.

However, the hard truth is that infatuation does not last. The other person, no matter how wonderful he or she might actually be, is not God and can never be enough (and we are unfair to him or her when we unconsciously expect them to be enough). For a while, they are able to carry that godliness for us, but that illusion of godliness will eventually break and we will realize that this is just a person, one person, wonderful perhaps, but finite, limited and not divine. That realization (which is ultimately meant to be the ground for mature love) can, if not understood, jeopardize or sour a relationship.

God invented falling in love! In it, we get a little foretaste of heaven, though, as experience tells us that is not without its dangers.

(Oblate Father Ron Rolheiser is a theologian, teacher and award-winning author. He can be contacted through his website www.ronrolheiser.com.)

Called by Name

A priest or a seminarian, can slowly but surely be steered away from his call if he stops pondering the mystery of God’s love for him and starts to become, as one of my professors used to quip in seminary, ‘a sacramental Pez dispenser.’ (If you don’t know what Pez are, they are little sugar tablets that come in decorated dispensers, and you should try them.)

I hope I’m not scandalizing anyone by saying that celebrating Mass can become routine, and dispensing the sacraments can become routine. A priest can start to doubt his call and start to feel like he is a machine who exists to give out the sacraments while living a life that does not honor the reality of his whole person. Profound liturgies can become a dull routine if a priest does not understand, or does not prayerfully enter into the reality that his priesthood is a call to a mysterious and profound relationship with Jesus Christ and the Holy Trinity.

Father Nick Adam

Priesthood is not a job, but if we are not formed to believe this and more deeply understand this, it can feel like a job. Priesthood is a change in a man’s being, at the level of his soul, and it is an invitation to become a vessel of God’s love for humanity in a specific way. It is also an invitation into a different type of relationship with God himself. The Lord desires His priests to speak God’s wisdom to a world that has forgotten it. He desires his priests to enter so deeply into the mystery of his love for them and for the world that they cannot help but proclaim it at Mass, and they delight in the dispensation of grace that comes from dispensing the sacraments.

The seminaries that are forming our men are seeking to highlight how to be a priest, not just how to act as a priest. One of the fruits of modern priestly formation that I’ve experienced is a dedication to silent prayer. I just returned from a five-day silent retreat. It was the first time I went on retreat since I became a pastor, and I quickly realized how tempted I would be to break silence in order to ‘check on things.’ But because I was taught in the seminary that my priesthood is not about what I do, but rather is about who I am, I knew that I needed all that time in silence so that Jesus and I could talk. We needed to talk about my triumphs and my shortcomings. We needed to talk about my fears and my brokenness. Most of all, I needed time to be reminded of God’s presence in my life and the call that he placed on my heart to be His priest.

In my last article I encouraged you to support and encourage our priests in their call to celibacy. This week, I ask that you encourage your priests to be men of prayer. When you see them in the Church sitting quietly, say a quick prayer that they take their time and reject any lies that they should ‘get to work.’ Encourage them after a moving homily by saying, ‘Father, you must have been praying this week because that was a spirit-filled homily.’ Encourage them to pray because none of us can give what we don’t have. If a priest is not assured of God’s love for him and the call that he has placed on his heart, he won’t be the bold witness that he has been called to be.