DIOCESAN NEWS
08/22/08
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Ever since high school, we’ve been best friends
(This is the fourth article in a monthly series, Hearing the Call, which features interviews with Catholics of all ages and situations who “have welcomed Christ’s call . . . to proclaim the Good News everywhere in the world” (Catechism, #3). To comment or submit ideas for future interviews contact Father Kent Bowlds, vocation director, frkent@bellsouth.net, www.jacksonvocations.com, 653 Claiborne Ave., Jackson, MS 39209, 601-944-9844.)

By Fr. Kent Bowlds
     The nuptial blessing in the rite of marriage is a beautiful expression of our belief that marriage is a holy vocation. Eddie and Yvette Howard, Crystal Springs, are celebrating their 25th anniversary this August, and their relationship gives flesh to the words of that blessing.
“Father . . . you made the union of husband and wife an image of the covenant between you and your people.”
     Eddie– Before we got married, I wondered what it would be like to be together all the time, and if we could really stand it! (Laughs) It’s not like we’ve never had an argument, but we’ve been very blessed. We were friends before we were married, and 25 years later I think we’re still friends.
     Yvette – He’s my best friend, seriously; if I have a problem he’s going to be the one I go to first.
     Eddie – I think you have to put your partner’s wishes and needs at least equal to your own, if not ahead of your own.
     Yvette – We always made sure we had some time by ourselves – someone keeping the kids – so we could go away to a weekend retreat or to the beach, someplace where we could have quiet quality time together and major conversations, so we could keep the marriage strong.
     “Give them children to be formed by the Gospel and to have a place in your family.”
     Yvette – We’ve always joked that all our money goes to eating out and to family vacations – sitting around the dinner table as a family to share life events and daily matters, and taking trips with the girls (Shanna and Melissa). The best thing is all the memories we made together as a family. Even now the girls often say, “Remember when we . . . ,” and they still like to hang out with us!
     “Lord, may they both praise you when they are happy and turn to you in their sorrows.”
     Yvette – When my momma got sick with cancer, that was a time that put a lot of stress on our marriage, because we were used to spending so much time together, but then my focus turned more on her, and he took care of the kids more.
     Eddie – She might have felt like she was away too much, but it never hurt me that she needed and wanted to spend time with her mother, because I knew that time was important.      You have to understand what family really means to your partner.
     Yvette – To couples about to be married I would say, “Talk a lot and find out what is truly important in each other’s lives, and go to church together. Keep God as a major focus in your life.” I was a Sunday school teacher before we were married, and we were CYO advisors together after we were married. Church has always been the number one thing in our lives and that’s the way we raised our children. I think that has a lot to do with our being so comfortable with each other.
     “May they reach old age in the company of their friends, and come at last to the kingdom of heaven.”
     Yvette – When you’re young you don’t realize how it’s all interrelated, and then you kind of grow into seeing how your marriage can affect the people in your church, and they can have an effect on your marriage, and your marriage can affect your big extended family, and likewise they can affect your marriage.
     Eddie – It doesn’t seem like 25 years. In some ways it seems like we’ve been together forever; I can’t imagine not being together.
     Yvette – Ever since high school it’s always been “Eddie and Yvette!”

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